A Perspective Shift

By Kathy Pollard

I had two major projects in mind for our fair-weather, mostly-free weekend. One was outside, one was inside, and both required help from my strong husband. Instead I ended up taking him to Urgent Care on Friday and he spent the weekend on antibiotics and pain meds with his left leg elevated. I felt bad for him but also felt sorry for myself for my foiled plans.

On top of that, our 11-year-old Westipoo started having nighttime anxiety. I felt bad for him but also felt sorry for me because all that shaking and panting is interfering with decent sleep.

Grumble, grumble.

Then as I was in the kitchen Saturday night, I heard Neal gasp in the living room. I ran in there to find him looking at his phone and saying, “Oh no! Oh no!” I was so afraid to ask, “What happened?!” Our 3-year-old grandson got ahold of something toxic and was being medevaced to Vanderbilt.

I know it’s happened to you, too. You head into your weekend with plans but they’re upended. You wring your hands about something trifling only to have a real crisis come along and make you feel silly for ever giving the trifle a thought.

It’s the unexpected, horrible, fearful moments that sharpen my focus. I HATE them but apparently I still need them. Who cares about my neglected projects?! Neither of them were important. What’s the big deal about a few nights of fitful sleep? Many people lose sleep for far more serious reasons. I felt ashamed for complaining. I felt grateful for life, family, and answered prayers.

Last night in worship we sang, “All my life He has been faithful. All my life He has been so, so good. With every breath that I am able I will sing of the goodness of God.” I couldn’t even finish the song as the words hit me square in the heart and tears coursed down my cheeks.

I hope I’ll remember the lesson a little longer this time. When I was sulking, God knew what was coming. And in the middle of the 24-hour window of panic and pleading, I was reminded me of His grace and patience. I saw God’s tender care in the prayers and hugs from our church family. I saw the strength and faith of my son and daughter-in-law as their little boy struggled all night. I saw the selflessness of friends and family as they jumped in to watch the other children, feed their animals, and fill a pulpit.

When I awoke this morning, I didn’t give a single thought to unfinished projects. I thanked God that our grandson is going to be okay. I didn’t lose a weekend, I gained a better perspective.

“For you, O Lord, are good and forgiving, abounding in steadfast love to all who call upon You.”

(Psalm 86:5)

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